Visiting Syria and Lebanon it was clear that people today, in that area of the world, still see reality through a lens of tribe. But my experience is that tribalism is alive and well and fairly pervasive beyond the Middle East. In the US of A it seems that the drive to find one’s tribe is gaining strength. This desire to bond with a somewhat exclusive, homogeneous group tends to deepen when the context in which we live feels more and more uncertain and unpredictable. We seek the false sense of security of a self-contained pod where we imagine that we can control our reality. Here, among others with whom we sense some affinity, we look to find our identity, a sense of belonging, the psycho-social embrace of WE.

We share the same beliefs and values and way of seeing, thinking and speaking of reality. We are right. We are good. We are the true… The problem is THEY. They are wrong. They are inherently evil. They are the false… We are saved. They are not. Tragically the glue of these contemporary tribes is fear. The other is a threat to our way of life. They must be put in their place, or better yet, eliminated. This is our just and justified crusade.

Violence becomes acceptable. Look at gangs. The Mafia. These are extreme examples of tribes. But we have seen that there are other tribes. I am Democrat. I am Republican. I am conservative. I am progressive. Instead of being associates of some group, this is who we are. Instead of leaning in a direction, we are totally in (totalitarians!). Real change is discouraged. Conformity, uniformity, discrimination are marks of these tribes. There is no room for the other, the different.

What happens to simple civility, respect, openness, desire to grow beyond? These are stifled. Civilization suffers. We all suffer, when the fact is, there is no US and THEM. These are perniciously false and artificial labels. We are all human beings with the same dreams, joys, fears, deepest desires, and we are all in this adventure of becoming more fully human together. There is only US. And we’d better start living this truth together soon.

Of course, this tendency to seek security through a dualism isn’t new. But it is totally antithetical to the teachings of Jesus. There is only one God, who created us all. All humans are brothers and sisters. And we share the same basic reality with all creation. We share the same mission to build up God’s Kingdom, guided by God’s Spirit. We are not above. We are a part of a whole. No one ever needs to be, or to feel, alone.

One of the clearest and most radical aspects of Jesus’ life and way is inclusivity. He chose to dine with all sorts of folks. He didn’t choose one group over another. Poor, rich, Pharisee, sinner… Yet shortly after his death and Resurrection, St. Paul is writing to the Christian community in Corinth, scolding and warning them about their destructive tendency to divide into cliques or factions. Some claimed to be adherents of Paul, some of Apollos (another Christian leader), some of Peter, and some (rightly) claimed allegiance to Christ. There was also preferential treatment of rich members over poorer ones. How quickly we drift into the comfortable security blanket of US versus THEM.

What might be an antidote to this insidious human trait? Love! Love as we are loved. Instead of writing anyone off, work to understand them and where they are coming from. Choose curiosity over condemnation. Isn’t that different and interesting? Why is it? Risk dialogue. Get to know the other, not to discover or prove how right we are, and how wrong they are. Who are they? What’s their story? What has been their life’s journey so far? Talk things out. It doesn’t mean that you need to like or to agree with everything, but listen – without the judgmental tape playing as background music in your head. Discover the common humanity of every one. 

We are infinitely more alike than different at core. Welcome the other as sister, as brother. We all belong to the same race, the same family. We are already absolutely precious and wonderful – beloved. We don’t need to put anyone down to try to boost our own status. Let us strive together to seek the good of all, the common good. The alternative is tearing one another apart – mutually assured destruction (M.A.D.) Let us discover together what is better for all and dedicate ourselves to work to make this our shared reality. It will cost all of us something, but it will bring us closer to the Kingdom Jesus introduced.

When we are very young, mommies and daddies (and to some extent all adults) seem to have amazing powers. They are big and strong and know everything. They can do fantastic things that are clearly beyond our ability to understand or imagine. They are to be respected, maybe even feared. Obedience to them certainly is the better option for tiny creatures. 

One of the most incredible abilities that parents, especially mommies, have is that mysterious healing kiss. One well-placed kiss and, right away or in just a moment, the hurt fades away and all is better. Sadly, we grow older and the owies that we run into along the way are much, much bigger. Mommy’s kiss just doesn’t have the same healing force anymore.

It’s possible that sometimes, without even realizing it, we might want to believe in a god who can kiss it and make it all better. We hurt so badly, those we care for hurt so badly, our whole broken, bleeding world hurts so badly that we long for a god to magically intervene and set everything right. That god never shows up, like some wizard or superhero, to destroy the evil, and the evildoers, through prodigious deeds of power and might. Spoiler alert!  God will not make it all better.

The God we are given is more like the parent who sits with their child day and night as that child battles some horribly painful, destructive disease. God is with us (Emmanuel), day and night, loving us, comforting us from our many fears. This God will hold our hand and walk with us through this life into fullness of Life.