Very early in the Gospel of John (John 1:38) Jesus asks this question of two disciples of John the Baptizer whom John directed to Jesus – the real deal. “What are you looking for?” It’s often used at the beginning of a directed retreat to help the retreatant to focus on what is it they really want from this time apart and in silence with God. The two disciples seemed to be surprised by Jesus’ turning around and directing this question to them. All they can come up with is, “Where are you staying (or abiding)?” Not very well thought out!
What Jesus was asking these followers certainly can be taken on several levels, and could be interpreted as “Why are you coming in this direction?” or “What do you want?” or, more likely with Jesus, “What are you most deeply seeking in your life?” Jesus has a tendency to push us and probe us and invite us to look at what’s really going on within us.
Life comes at us day by day, always moving, drawing us along, with little or no time to step back and consider what it’s all about. It’s as if the days fly by. There are, and will constantly be, pieces of reality clamoring for our attention and action. Are they all with the same urgency? Are they all of utmost importance? In the midst of the noise and busyness we cannot begin to sort anything out, prioritize, or just let some of it go. No wonder our life can feel overwhelming!
We don’t need a retreat to stop and hear Jesus asking us, “What is it that you truly are seeking?” We know the answer within ourselves. We want to be free and happy and fully alive. To make this our priority, in the midst of everything we have decided must be done now, demands courage and sacrifice. We need to let go of our illusions.
We don’t and can’t control anything. We can’t keep ourselves, or anyone else safe from all harm. We can’t guarantee that everything we want will come to be. All our efforts won’t make what we think should happen, in fact happen. It will ever be easy to slip back into our familiar, comfortable routines, because we cling to them, because we’ve convinced ourselves that this is the right way to live.
What are you looking for? Give yourself five minutes to step away from all you are caught up with. Look into your heart. What’s missing? Time just to be? Joy? A sense that you’re fine as you are? What have you deprived yourself of while you’ve distracted yourself with so much other than what you need?
No matter what response we give to Jesus, if we continue along his way, he will answer, “Come and See.” “Come away and you will see.” Go ahead. Give yourself this invaluable gift. It’s worth it.
Jana D Buckley says:
Great suggestion to start with just 5 minutes to pause and reflect.
We do get very caught up in the here and now urgencies of each day/time period.
Truly, we do need to take more than 5 minutes for our own mental health, but if we cannot do 5 minutes, longer will definitely not happen. However, if we can do some introspective for five minutes, there is a chance we will make more time as needed.